Thursday, August 12, 2010

Seriously Thought About It, But Didn't Do It...

I don't know if anyone is even reading this blog, but a lot of people do read skippy. Once in a while, I make a contribution to his blog. To this day, I think it's the best blog on the Internet -- at least when I'm not on the main page.

See, there's been this ongoing antagonism between me and some of the people who post and/or leave comments over there, very likely including skippy, that has existed for quite some time. It would flare up every now and then over certain issues where I found myself in a minority position among other left-leaning people. I don't know when this started or what started it, but it's there. One flare-up began when I said some disparaging things about gay marriage, which I'll admit is a very odd thing for a gay man to do. I've retuned my attitude toward it since then, and I know I'm way overdue in apologizing to more than a few people for some of the things I said.

It's just that when I hear things like "marriage is not just a fundamental right for all, it's the fundamental right" and how wonderful it is, my eyes begin to glaze over and turn red at the same time. I come from a family that is painfully familiar with divorce -- don't ever tell me how fucking wonderful marriage is, because a large part of my childhood consisted of living through what can happen when a marriage fails. It was dreadful, to say the least, and I haven't forgotten it.

But then there was the time in 2006 when amending the state Constitution to define marriage as a union between a man and a woman appeared on the Virginia ballot. It passed handily. I voted against it -- and this was a year and a half before I went on skippy's blog and the old Medley and declared that I was gay. So in spite of a lot of the things I've said, I think my record on supporting gay marriage is crystal clear and beyond dispute -- I may question it 364 days of any given year, but on the day I cast my vote, I'm 100% for it. So that's the back story behind that one flare-up.

A second flare-up on skippy's site occurred last year, during the debate over health care reform. Scores of fellow lefties were saying there shouldn't be an HCR bill that doesn't include a public option. Personally, I wanted a bill that included a public option, too, but what I didn't want was no bill at all.

What blew my mind at the time, though, was that my take on things was shared by... well, no one that I can think of. Liberals and self-proclaimed progressives, one after another, were happier with the prospect of letting the bill die if it had no public option -- something I thought was like throwing the baby out with the bath water. So I went and said, "Pass the stupid damn bill.". In response, skippy said, "No, we can't just pass the stupid damn bill." As for how that drama played out, all I'll say is, a month or so later, when the professional left {*cough cough*} A-list liberal bloggers realized no HCR bill was worse than a bad one, they started telling -- and petitioning -- the rest of us as follows: Pass The Damn Bill. I know full well that they didn't get that from me -- they left the "stupid" bit out. But I much prefer being ahead of the curve to being anyone's inspiration.

Anyway, now there's another flare-up over at skippy international -- and this one confirms all my worst suspicions. Just go over there and read my second-to-last post. In it, I say that what Press Secretary Gibbs said about the "professional left" is mostly correct. Then click on the kangaroo image in the upper right hand corner of the main page and read what Jill and skippy said after what I said. I'm not sure if I should contribute any more posts over there. Right now, that doesn't seem like a good idea.

I don't feel like I'm making a total break from that site. We're all going to vote pretty much the same way in November. At day's end, we're all on the same page. When it comes to blogging, skippy and I clash too often. Jill and I clash quite a bit, too. Maybe I should just stay away from there. I think I hurt the site more than I help it. And I'm tired of this.

But I'm not going to stop blogging. I'm the kind of guy who speaks from his heart, come what may. I just need to choose my outlets more wisely, that's all...

* * *

Almost forgot...

The title of this post? What I seriously considered doing was deleting every single post I ever wrote for skippy going back five-plus years. At one point this afternoon while at work, I was actually hell-bent on doing that.

Fortunately, I calmed down before I got back home. But that's what I'm talking about concerning these recurring flare-ups. I simply can't keep doing this, folks. I got a 40th birthday coming up next week. I'm getting too old for this shit...


  1. Hmm. I never put this site on my blogroll before, but it's on there now. Frankly, some of your posts over at skippy's I remember nodding my head in agreement. If you don't want to be on my blogroll, let me know and I will remove it, ok?

  2. >I'm getting too old

    Bartkid sez,
    Dude, I've been old since I've been 21.
    (Had a 16-year-old roommate who asked how old I was: "21? Man! That's old!")

    I'm sure if you and I went through a checklist, we would find something to disagree on, but I know it is always a struggle on how to live with people who you agree with most of the time, but when you find out there's one (or a few things), you don't, to NOT go all circular firing squad on each other.

    I'm thinking about Representative Grayson's take on Net Neutrality. A lot of progressives are going "But, but, Alan, no; you're dead to me."

    I haven't heard his full line of thinking on it, but I don't see the usefulness of the internet disappearing. If Verizon makes it too difficult to access websites and if it demands kickbacks from content providers, don't expect Verizon to survive many business quarters. Someone much wiser than me pointed out that the internet views censorship as a routing blip, to be sidestepped easily.

    I'm sure my point of view on this will be viewed by a good chunk of the profession left blogosphere as heresy or naivete, but my reaction, meh.

    BTW, yer cute when yer mad, Jim.
    Keep kickin' against the pricks.


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