Thursday, July 31, 2014

Can The Red Sox DFA The Owners?

Or, failing that, can someone explain to me why, when your team's offense and not its pitching is the big problem, you would trade away your two best starting pitchers who have proven their worth to you for hitters who may or may not work out in their new home?

The Red Sox starting five in April were Jon Lester, John Lackey, Jake Peavy, Clay Buchholz, and Felix Doubront. Lester got to pitch in the All-Star game, and Lackey's having a hell of a year in his own right. But of the five, my favorite is still Peavy, even though he was 1-9 before he was traded to the Giants. He's 33 and not what he used to be, but every time he got on the mound, I wanted him to win, because he went to work every day and always played to win -- and he might have been at least 4-9 if he'd had some goddamned run support.

Then there was Doubront. It got to the point where when he took the mound, I wanted him to just try -- his performance this year was bad enough to put him in the bullpen, and he did so poorly there, he got himself traded to the Cubs the other day. At least Peavy went to a team that's in solid contention for a World Series bid -- Doubront went from one cellar dweller to another. Good luck with that, Felix.

And that sucks, because last year, Felix had a two-month stretch where he was the ace the way he was pitching; it was Lester who was going through a rough patch. I don't know what happened to Doubront this year.

But he went to the Cubs, Peavy went to the Giants, and then there were three. I knew Lester was on the trading block, but until I heard he went to the A's this afternoon, I refused to believe he'd be let go.

And then John Lackey, too? Really? A guy who came back from that 2011 beer-and-chicken infamy and Tommy John surgery to help win a World Series last year -- he gets traded to the Cardinals, the team he beat for that ring?

Dear Red Sox Brass: What are you, fuckin' stupid?!  Oh, my, God. There's rebuilding a broken team, and then there's killing your golden goose. You want to build a castle in the sky, go ahead, but don't sell your house here on earth so you can go live in it...

Thursday, July 10, 2014

Well, That Didn't Take Long...

The Boston Red Sox went and designated catcher A. J. Pierzynski for assignment. That, basically, is baseball's nice way of saying GTFO. I can't say he didn't have it coming -- when two of the Red Sox's five starting pitchers say they want backup catcher David Ross behind the plate instead of you when they're on the bump, you're in hot water. But when those two starters happen to be the strongest (Jon Lester) and the weakest (Jake Peavy) as well... damn, how often does that happen in the majors?

It's kind of a shame, because Pierzynski did have a few golden moments playing for Boston, including a grand slam. I knew he had a reputation for being a dickhead long before coming to Fenway, in addition to being a hot-or-cold type of hitter throughout his career, but man, those few times he was hot, he was my dickhead. I hate chip-on-the-shoulder types when they're politicians; when they're Red Sox players, I'll give 'em trainloads of chances, even when they suck.

That's why I'm a little bummed A. J. is outta Boston. Yes, he was an ill fit for that team from the word go, and that's what I keep hearing.

You know what? So was Tom Yawkey. And deep down, every single member of the Red Sox Nation worth their salt-and-vinegar knows goddamned well which of those two dickheads has done more damage to this team...

Thursday, July 3, 2014

Three Things I Would Say To A. J. Pierzynski If I Were John Farrell...

One: When the umpire calls a pitch you think is a strike a ball, shut the fuck up.

Two: When the umpire calls a pitch you think is a ball a strike, shut the fuck up.

And three: I knew Jarrod Saltalamacchia. I won a World Series with Jarrod Saltalamacchia. A. J., you're no Jarrod Saltalamacchia. So SHUT THE FUCK UP.

And play ball...